A quick checking in post about next to nothing!

Dragging myself out of bed last Sunday was simply agonising. Most people classify me as a morning person. Personally, I disagree but I have to admit that I don't struggle with getting up most of the time. However, I guess that phoning my mother late the night before was a bad idea - we don't seem to be able to have a short conversation - and it ended up with me getting under five hours sleep. 

Oops. 

However, it was well worth the pain as I dragged myself around the room, attempting to get dressed without bumping into every piece of furniture. I was off to Utrecht to see someone who I have not seen in way too long, the lovely Annelies.

We had planned on climbing the Dom (Cathedral) tower but it was kinda miserable weather so we decided to leave that for a nicer day and mooch generally. She kindly showed me some of her favourite shops (and she has great taste) and we explored a little. It was great to see her after so long and a truly welcome break from all the studying even if it wasn't sensible to take aforementioned break!

I also managed to go out briefly with the fearsome Leonoor and Dania-duo on Tuesday. We all ate out, despite none of us really being able to afford it, were joined by Fietje and had a thoroughly enjoyable evening!

Other than that, I continued my fight with German. I don't know if I'm winning the fight but it's not taken won yet. As I've said, I love my teacher, I love the syllabus, I love my class - it's the intensive period speed that I cannot manage. That said, I think I did well in my exam today.

I also had an group examined presentation which generally went well. I had a flare up with my heart problem in the middle of the presentation which sucked because you try speaking a language you're quite new to speaking while your heart is doing a jolly good impression of a bee and you're aware that if it doesn't stop in a few you're likely to collapse! Anyway, that's something that's been flaring up more over the last few months so it sounds like someone's going to have another cardiologist appointment soon (urgh!!!) It's also not a big deal so I'm not overly bothered. Just hope the grade hasn't suffered!

I do feel that, in the six months (plus) between this German course and the next it will have time to sink in and I will actually be able to process what I've learned. I get it. I love it. My brain's just saturated!

And now I am spending the evening doing nothing that requires any thought at all. A bit of Wyldwood Radio, perhaps some painting... a lot of sleep!

Two weeks until freedom!

I write this in a state of post exam, mid intensive period lassitude. It's going to be one of those posts where, more so than normal, we are going to be lucky if anything makes sense. I'll be honest with you, I am counting down the days until the end of term and until, firstly, my mother comes out and then until I go back home to England for a few weeks.

So, why the change of tone from my last post about my German A1 classes?

It's not that I  don't love German. I do. It's just that it is a language with many grammatical rules and linguistic quirks. It's not that I don't have a good teacher. I do. It's just that we are going at such a speed, as dictated by the schedule, that I feel that I'm being hit over the head with each new piece of information, unable to absorb any of it. It's simply not how my brain works and, in fact, I wonder if anyone can really learn a language under these conditions in such a way as it is practical and not simply academic.

I feel that someones understanding of a language is something that really does have to develop rather organically. I'm a big supporter of the idea that we best learn languages as children do although I'm also well aware that the mistakes children make when they're learning are decidedly less adorable coming from the mouth of a young adult. So, it seems that, while lessons are desirable for those of use who are no longer in the first few years of life, there should be some element of slower absorption whereby the language becomes natural as opposed to a stinted and formulaic production.

Okay, I'm also really frustrated that I understand such complex things in the language but can hardly string a sentence together for myself. Actually, frustrated does not begin to cover it.

That aside, I have a great little group in the class who are supportive and generally great fun so I am managing to maintain some semblance of sanity. I have the lovely Jacopo putting up with my moaning and reminding me that I actually do like the subject (as well as competing with me by setting up his own blog!) And, I am going to finally meet up with Annelies once again on Sunday which I am so looking forward to.

I'm afraid I've been living and breathing German recently so that's all I have to say. Oh, I do have a blog post in the making regarding the wonderful gig I went to last weekend but I have such little time (and such few free brain cells) that I'm struggling to describe the evening in anything like an eloquent fashion... Soon!

Sleep and relaxation

Okay, the title is wishful thinking, coming from the mind of a sleep deprived person, but there we go! My last post was only a couple of days ago but life's busy enough that I'm able to write pretty often and easily find things to talk about.

The highlight of Thursday night:
Walking home with a dinosaur... in a hoodie.

Thursday evening was an open stage and awards night. It was the social summary of the introduction week but, to be quite honest, I wasn't really looking forward to it that much. As it happened, it was an okay evening. There were some really talented people, some funny acts, but it was a bit chaotic and haphazard and I was generally tired and not really wanting to be there. I think, by that stage, I needed my bed, and some space!

Friday was a shorter day, with just an hour long tutor session on time management. The session ran over and we didn't finish properly. The irony is not lost. Anywho, most of the other students tootled on off to their weekend away and I stayed behind. Hope they're having a good time while I relax ;-)

I decided to use Friday afternoon for paperwork and admin, of which there is more than you could possibly imagine. I mean, think of all the things you would need to do to move abroad and then times that idea by four. It's really surprising how much there is to do... but I digress. Finding that I needed to print one of the forms off, and lacking a printer, Maria, one of my penpals, kindly offered to print off the form for me and to bring it round.

She arrived at around four pm and then suddenly it was dark. It was the first time we'd met in person but somehow we managed to get on so easily that time just flew past without either of us noticing. It was so nice to meet her, finally, and to chat. I'm looking forward to seeing her again soon, I hope!

Today was a less impromptu meeting, with the lovely Annelies. She showed me round Amsterdam a little more, and showed me some lovely shops that were definitely my style. We then stumbled across the Uitmarkt which is a free festival thing, at the beginning of the season, with events and stands based around all the arts. It was great to explore some of the things that will be going on over the next few months (even if as a poor student I won't be able to afford to go!!!) and it's quite exciting. Annelies also trained me in the art of taking things that were offered for free ;-)

What can I say? The hats were free!

Events aside, we had a good day! Annelies is a really kind person and such good fun too so it's great to get to meet up with her. It's certainly been a good start to my weekend! As for how it will continue? Sleep and relaxation, of course! (*)




(*) Please note: "Sleep and relaxation" hereby means "filling in forms, doing grocery shopping, attempting to unpack the flat, and preparing for my first classes!"

What a week!

The last few days have been really lovely as my 'really busy week' concluded with the visit from my penpal, and friend, Annelies.

You can't visit Birmingham without having your photo taken here!

She arrived on Thursday and we spent the afternoon wandering around a little bit of Birmingham and exploring the jewellery quarter a little bit. Of course, I hardly know my way around the jewellery quarter as I've only been there once so I didn't really manage to show it off but oh well! That wasn't the important bit!

Friday we went to The Black Country Living Museum which is a museum chronicling life in the industrial area around Dudley. Although it didn't seem as 'alive' as other times I've visited it was great to look around again. I went to this museum many, many times as a child but hadn't visited for a good five years or so. It was also a good place to challenge Annelies' English because goodness knows a strong Black Country accent (and dialect) is hard for even a native speaker at times.

Yesterday was another day in Birmingham. First we went to the new(ish) library, somewhere I hadn't managed to visit since it opened. My goodness, what a library! I really cannot wait to go back there and actually borrow some books. It's huge. I think it's the largest regional library in Europe or something so I guess I should have expected big but my so many books... what a dream! And how exciting to have those resources available for research! Ahem.

So big. So many books. Happy Havanah.

Later we mooched around the shopping areas and also visited the Bullring markets. I was a bit sad that I couldn't find a sheeps head this time but it was still good fun to walk through the stalls with butchers (and other salesmen but it's the butchers that stand out) attempting to sell their wares. We also spent a bit of time in the Selfridges food hall. For some reason, I've not spent a lot of time there although I've been in the store for makeup and clothing. I'll be revisiting the food hall, no doubt!

Anyway, today Annelies went on to London for a few days and, I hope, is having a wonderful time down there. I was so happy to meet her and I think we got on really well so hopefully we'll see each other again soon when I'm out in the Netherlands (or when she comes over here).

Now, I'm going to enjoy catching up on my sleep!

Onwards and upwards!

It seems that, after a couple of months of rather painful stagnation, life is moving forwards at an amazing pace.

This morning was my singing lesson, as normal, and it went exceptionally well. Okay, I actually had my singing teacher jumping up and down clapping her hands because she was so pleased with the progress I was making. She also ran out to the car and told my mother. You have no idea how amazed this made me. It's been under six months and I have gone from someone who was afraid to sing in front of someone, unable to get more than a few sounds out in a lesson, to the position I'm in now. I still can't say that I feel that my voice is 'good' or even 'okay' but there are moments when I actually like what I hear. There are moments when I feel more confident. Physically and mentally I can see so much progress and you have no idea how much that means to me. It's nothing short of a miracle!

I also received an email regarding my university interview and 'meet-and-greet'. It's going to be a challenging day, I'd wager. There are group activities, mock classes, discussions and question and answer sessions (as well as some optional social activities which I think it might be best to hang around for). I'm  really excited but a little daunted too. Mind you, I guess that's a healthy state of mind because a little adrenaline helps us to do our best, right? I've been given a choice of dates but, as long as I can arrange the flights, I'm probably going to go in about four weeks time. Goodness, this is way too real for my liking!!

This evening has been an evening of writing to people about meeting up. I'm going to have to rearrange meeting with Aimee because of the interview. I'm meeting the amazing Nené (i.e. one of the best friends a girl could have) a week today and I am so so excited. It's been way too long! Haydon and I have also managed to arrange our meeting up, at last, and it's going to be great to see him too. Considering I used to see him almost every day at college, it's been strange to not see him for ages. And then we have the impending visit from Annelies which is really exciting as I will get to meet my penpal :-D

Gosh, it's going to be a wonderfully busy month or two! I will also return to taking photos as I will take my little DSLR round with me. My compact has rather given up the ghost hence the boring text only posts.

Putting things back in perspective

Yesterday was difficult for me. It saw me miss out on something that I was really looking forward to (well several things really) because I wasn't well. In my ill haze I couldn't help but feel angry with myself, after all it was as though my own body was letting me down...again. Yesterday it felt like, after everything that has happened recently, this was the final straw, the end of the world.

Today, after a sleep and without being in so much discomfort everything does seem a lot better. My head is still spinning and my lungs ache something chronic but other than that I feel all but better and I can look at yesterday a lot more objectively.

It wasn't the end of the world. Yes, I won't get to look around the university but if I get an interview I will have a chance to get a feel of it so it doesn't matter all that much.

KLM are going to let us reschedule the flights, albeit for a small admin fee. When I was taken ill at the airport I expected it to be 400 pounds gone. We will be able to use these flights to rebook if I get an interview or just to look around Amsterdam.

Annelies and I will get to meet up some other time. She's been lovely over this period too and, to be fair, that kind of human compassion is what makes this world so special. 

I got to go through areas of the airport normal people never get to see. I also went through immigration without actually having been abroad which was a bizarre little experience! These are all new experiences, and experiences a lot of people don't have.

And, last but not least, I ended up spending so much time in the airport that I got to listen to a load of announcements in Dutch and I understood them. Hello proof that my Dutch understanding is improving even if the reproduction isn't ;-)

Somehow, what happened yesterday doesn't seem so bad after all!

Incidentally, this is my 100th blog post

Well, I didn't get quite as far as intended

Okay, I'll be honest, today has been a horrible day. It's been one of the worst days in a long, long time. I was supposed to be going to Amsterdam to look around the university I applied to but I didn't manage to leave the country.

I didn't feel top form when I woke up this morning. By the time I was airside I felt pretty grim. In the end I had to leave without flying. I didn't manage to look at the university, which was vitally important, and I didn't manage to meet up with Annelies, which was something I was so looking forward to doing.

I will admit that I have spent most of the day either sleeping or crying. I feel better now than I did, although still not 100% by any stretch of the imagination but I am really sorrowing on what I have missed. Even more than that, I feel like my own body has once again let me down. I'm sure I'll feel better in the morning, and when I feel less ill, and my mind tells me that everything happens for a reason and things will work out in the end but I just feel incredibly low. I normally wouldn't blog if I felt a bit down because I'm not into letting people know but the fact is that most people know that I was supposed to be traveling today and a lot of (lovely) people have written to ask how it went.

KLM, who I was supposed to be flying with, have been really wonderful and have put a note on the booking so we'll be able to rearrange our flights. This means I'll be able to visit Amsterdam even if I miss out on seeing the university and I'll manage to see Annelies, I hope, too.

Eh, things will sort themselves out in time.

Om nom nom

My parents have just got back from doing the last of the Christmas food shopping, well the bits that we can get in advance. I wasn't really planning on writing about that but it seems that my last couple of days have rather resolved around food in some way or another so it might as well be mentioned!

Dad bought me back a pudding that I'm allergic to (again)
so I decided to photograph it instead!

Last night I went to a restaurant with my mother and a friend of the family we quite often go there because it serves beautiful Italian food. Usually I'll have a spinach ravioli which is beautiful but, due to being a bit ill the yesterday morning, I had a minestrone soup with fresh bread which was absolutely wonderful. The highlight of the evening had to be one of the waiters, prompted by my mother telling him about my interest in the accordion, coming across to my table with his piano accordion and chatting and playing. This was utter Havanah heaven.

I also managed to get Annelies' food parcel finished (at 2 a.m.), packed and sent. If Annelies happens to be reading this, and I don't think she does read my blog, look away now because I'm putting up a picture in a mo. I was really pleased to finish this little parcel because I wanted to get it on its way but I had such fun putting it together.

The all but assembled food parcel on my, as always, messy desk!

So yes, for someone who can't eat a lot, food is featuring quite heavily right now. Oh well, it's Christmas ;-)

Christmas Song of the Day

Gothic Christmas by Within Temptation.

Within Temptation were one of my utter favourite bands just as I was discovering music. Of course, I still love them! This song, although not one of their most musically impressive, never fails to make me smile! I thought it would contrast with the other songs I've been posting too!

More bitsy bits of life!

This is going to be another bitty blog, I’m afraid. I’m doing a lot of stuff none of which is worth its own post but eh, is anything really?

Singing

First thing is that, after a rather disastrous session last week, singing on Monday was wonderful. It’s really difficult for me because, not only am I trying to learn new techniques, build muscles in and control aspects of my body that usually go ignored, but I’m trying to do all this while fighting against the constant thought that I’m rubbish and should just shut up now. It’s the mental battle that’s the hardest bit and I feel like I’m pushing myself more and more each time. Last week it was too much and I fell apart a bit. This week, another student listened in on my class and I managed to carry on. I guess it’s one day at a time but for a person who refused to sing for years I feel I’ve made so much personal improvement in the three months or so that I’ve been singing. My teacher’s also got me working on “Ich gehör nur mir” (I knew it was a mistake telling her about Elisabeth in my first lesson!) and I managed to hit the last note so something in me is feeling incredibly good right now.

Christmas

After my singing lesson yesterday I migrated to Tesco in a state of complete exhaustion (I had grabbed half an hour of sleep the night before). In my quest for a postal box, I managed to find some lovely tartan wrapping paper and have since been sat wrapping gifts for my friends, and family.

One of the most exciting gifts I’m wrapping is going to a friend of mine from the Netherlands, Annelies. She had the wonderful idea of swapping some local foods over Christmas so we’re each sending a box of goodies across the channel. I love sending things to friends abroad, and receiving things too, as there’s something lovely about the physical connection when the majority of contact is through the interweb! Of course, I love food too so this is ideal ;-)

A small part of the gift parcel for Annelies,
featuring my beautiful wrapping paper.

Actually, I’m in Havanah heaven right now. I enjoy wrapping and preparing parcels, making cards etc. There’s something glorious about being able to give someone something that you have put time and effort into and that looks good. It’s a lovely way of showing your love and friendship for someone. That said, I’m not making bows etc this year. Not enough space and the ribbons all clashed with my (wonderful) wrapping paper!

Cesair

The other happening of a couple of hours ago was me finding this on my facebook feed.

Post by Cesair.

Again, whoops. Never expected this to be found either. Oh well, I’m pleased because if, as Thomas said, it made him, as a member of the band, happy for a little while then that’s wonderful. Cesair are one of my complete favourite bands and they deserve all the praise they get! Now go and listen to them!

Christmas Song of the Day

Lukas Perman and Marjan Shaki singing 100,000 Friedenslichter. 

Lyrics can be found in the video description if you view it on youtube.

Couple Lukas and Marjan are no strangers to working together, having stared alongside each other in various musicals, recorded an album together. I also really like their voices. It's not them that truly makes this video for me, it's the children. Watch it a few times and you'll see the children nudging each other to pay attention, attempting to organise each other, and generally being adorable. Fitting with this song.

For those of you who don't speak German, I can't find a translation, and I'm too lazy to do one myself, but rest assured that it's got some lovely lyrics. Shame you're missing out ;-)