That time we almost watched the eclipse...

Who cares if cloud was forecast? With the promise of a pretty full eclipse I was determined to be outside, attempting to see it. Well, I managed on the first part, the last part wasn't quite so successful.

After a quick ask round last night, Dania and Leonoor decided that they were both free, and stupid lovely enough, to join me. So, this morning, ignoring the ominous overcast nature of the sky, I filled several plastic bottles with tea (I don't have a multi-person flask), we bought croissants and orange juice, and we set off to the park.

Other than the constant cries of "I'm cold" coming from a certain person - no prizes for guessing who -  I think we had a pretty good fun time. I mean, sure, it wasn't exactly picnic weather but there's something rather enjoyable about sitting outside eating breakfast. It's certainly more worthwhile than being stuck in the flat working or, just as likely, in bed sleeping!

Just in case you do struggle to guess who was the moaning one!

However, sadly, the cloud cover didn't break for us and we didn't really catch a glimpse of the eclipse itself. I mean it did get a bit darker but, with the amount of cloud, that change felt more like the herald of a storm rather than an unusual event!

So, I'm just going to pretend that we weren't trying to see the eclipse at all. Instead we were having a casual picnic to celebrate the vernal equinox and that bit, at least, was pretty darn successful!

And it was fun too ;-)

I've found my calling as a tourguide!

Last Friday I was busy bouncing around with excitement. Some of my gig friends from the UK were coming out to visit and also to go to a couple of the Within Temptation theatre shows and somehow the mass facebook chats had made me feel as if I was going on holiday. Of course, Friday is also the day of my stupidly late class but somehow I managed to get out of class a bit early and somehow, with a fair bit of running involved, I managed to get on an early train. Because of this, I arrived at Schiphol just as their plane was landing which was a good thing considering they were up a strange end of the airport and it took me a fair while to find where they'd be arriving. That said, I'm a bit of a Schiphol pro now !! Waiting for them to come through the doors I did consider making a name sign simply because I've never had one before but y'know... didn't happen.

And then the group of five arrived. Kim and her mother Sarah, met on various occasions at a few shows, Marc and his mother Sandra, met once at a Within Temptation acoustic show in London, and Gemma who I had never met.

We then had the utter joy of the admin tasks. Buying five anonymous OV cards, charging them and counting out the Euros wrong was embarrassing enough, I tell you. Seriously Euros still feel like Monopoly money and large numbers... yuck! Oh and then the good old trains were all moved around, delayed and cancelled. It's a bit frightening when you feel responsible for a group, especially when you struggle to get them all to fit on one train!

Late at night - perhaps the only time you can get a photo without
hundreds of other tourists being in shot!

That said, we managed to get into town safely and, once checked into the hotel, we went for a little stroll into town. Our search for food led us to Rembrantplein (it seemed the most promising direction to head in) and it was worthwhile. For all that area may be a complete overpriced tourist trap, it is beautiful at night, and during the day, and I love it. A drink back at the hotel and everything seemed to be getting off to a great start.

Saturday

The annoying amount of work meant that I decided to stay home during the day while the group explored. I didn't get as much done as I'd hoped because I was still reading on the train that evening but I needed that time, and more!

Anyway, that evening was the first of the two Within Temptation dates and so all of us, sans Gemma, made our way to Almere. Walking through the closed shopping centre, totally deserted but yet a complete mass of neon lighting, Kim happened to remark on how it would make a perfect setting for a zombie film. With not another soul around, just rubbish blowing in the wind, it was hard to contradict her. Seriously, if my old urban studies teacher ever needed more proof that modern media uses zombies to represent consumerist culture...

We made it through zombie-land and found the theatre itself. After a preshow drink, we went into the hall only to discover that we were in the fourth row - why no-one had realised this from the tickets I do not know! I'm usually loathe to sit so close to the stage because you usually end up looking up and getting neck ache but, at this venue, we were at perfect eye height and it was wonderful. It made for an intimate show which was totally different to the show in Amsterdam a few days later.

When I eventually arrived back home I was bouncing off the ceiling. The show itself was something quite unlike anything I'd ever seen and I really needed some time to come down. Admittedly, phoning my mother and keeping her up until the early hours probably wasn't the fairest way to do this but I think she enjoyed my ranting to start with, at least ;-)

Sunday

Second home in Amsterdam

It was no real surprise that, come Sunday morning, everyone was pretty much dead. My delightful body decided to wake me up at six a.m. and refuse to believe that I really could sleep until nine and even then would not have enough sleep! It meant that, by the time I got the message from the others that they were pretty much all feeling crappy and could we meet later I was way too awake to go back to sleep. Worryingly, I can't remember what I did with that morning which should have been so productive. I ate toast, at least.

When we did meet, everyone feeling a little more alive than earlier, at least. we made our way to the Hard Rock Cafe. This was somewhere that Kim had been on her previous trip and somewhere that I had never been, basically. Having been unable to eat properly for the past week now (yay for health crap!) I stayed away from the rather exciting looking cocktails and the large very meat based dishes and had a strawberry lemonade and a caesar salad. I'm not complaining, to be honest, although my order did seem overly sensible, it was delicious.

After that, we made our way to the Anne Frank House. This was something that the group really had wanted to do and something that had never really attracted me so much. Her story is wonderful in its human poignancy, as are those untold or unshared stories of those whose humanity has been reduced to just names in registers. The people who helped hide her and others - amazing people who risked consequences upon themselves for doing the right thing which is something, sadly, I don't think many people would feel able to do. The only reason I'd not been so interested in the museum itself is that I had heard it was rather a let down. I found quite the opposite. It had been set up in a way that wasn't tacky, didn't glorify anyone, and allowed people to elegantly follow the story of those people involved. It allowed you to 'touch' the human beings involved in one event, to feel some connection to them, and then to expand it out, if not to every person then to some. Personally, I'm so pleased that I did visit and would now recommend it wholeheartedly.

After what was rather an emotional stop for all of us (I know I cried a bit going round), it was time to replenish with some cakes. I took the group to one of my favourite grab-a-cake shops and we grabbed cake ;-)

Well, you have to be a stereotypical tourist too, right?

After that we went for a quick stroll around the red light district because they had been told by so many people to behave and 'not' go there that it simply had to be done. I guess I don't need to describe this bit - women and the odd man in windows etc etc etc. It's also the best place for overheard conversations as slightly inebriated tourists speaking loudly about sex related things makes for an entertaining time. I'll leave that bit completely to your imagination!

Monday

Somehow, although I didn't realise it at the time, we managed to explore until super late again which meant getting up on Monday was even more painful, made worse by the fact I had three classes, all of which I was rather ill prepared for. That meant that, not only did I somehow have to get ready for the evening over the morning and the lunch period but I needed to juggle my final class prep work too. Somehow I managed and, at around six in the evening I was running for my tram in a veritable gale ending up with complete earache... but also getting there in time ;-)

The Amsterdam show was held in the Carré, a theatre that I had heard about but never visited. Seriously, it was so stunning. We were on the balcony this time, except for Gemma who was down in the stalls. We had a great time waving at her and having other people wave back... like those guys who returned my flirty wave interpreting it as aimed at them... oops. The show was exquisite and the setting really did do it a lot of favours... it was a bit wow!

After the show itself, the group, quite naturally, decided to gravitate towards the stage door in order to attempt to meet the band. I waited for Leonoor and Dania who had very kindly agreed to meet me after the show so I didn't have to make my way back late at night alone. However, a few minutes after their arrival we checked train times only to find that all the late trains had been cancelled and we were basically stranded by the delightful Amsterdam public transport system. We decided that there was no rush if we couldn't get home anyway. Dania and Leonoor being the complete heroes that they are waited with us until after 1 a.m. and put up with the usual pain of numb toes just to allow me to hang and meet some of the band. For all I detest the way in which fans gravitate on lead members of bands, Sharon in particular was so very lovely, and spent a lot of time making everyone feel special despite her PA rushing her, that I can't help but feel her status is well earned.

Waiting for the band in the cold. Worth it? Oh yes!

We eventually made our way back to the hotel although, as the bar was closed, I still owe my personal bodyguards a drink for their services. We also managed to get a taxi from the hotel which got us home in record time and for a lot less than I had thought so I can't complain at all there. It was such an amazing night and it ended so easily.

Tuesday

I had managed to switch to an earlier science class on the Tuesday so that I could spend a little more time with the group and see them safely to the airport. It seemed like a really good idea at the time but it was one of the most painful things I've ever done. Getting up at 6a.m. and staying awake through two hours lecture on the origins of the universe... well, it wasn't easy! That said, it was 100% worth it!

Magnums are not the most elegant things to eat ;-)

In town we first gravitated towards de Bijenkorf as Gemma wanted a frozen yoghurt and I just so happened to know a that they sold some good stuff. The rest of us gravitated towards the make your own magnum area. Not only are custom magnums tasty but they are also surprisingly fun and creative to design, bringing out the inner child in everyone.

After that it was back to the Hard Rock cafe for a farewell drink... or two... or three... or, in Gemma's case, four. Oh, wow, what a laugh! We were such a rowdy group but it was such fun. Something that I haven't managed to get across in this post is the amity. For a group that knew each other on a surface level to start with, we had spent a great deal of time with each other and had really gelled. Messing around on this final day seemed to sum up the trip in many ways, with all of us being totally relaxed and open. Okay, I'll admit it, I was a bit concerned about them missing their flight but other than that... ;-)

This image seems to sum up the craziness that was this final trip to Hard Rock <3

And then it was goodbye. It had only been a few days but they had been so special, so much fun, that parting was really difficult. I know it's only a temporary thing... there's no doubt that true friendships have been forged, but all the same...

Life is slowly returning to normal but I can't help but flick through the photos and remember the happenings of the last week as I look forward to, and start to plan, the Next Time.




Photos will be uploaded to my facebook as soon as I can fight my way through them all. Oh and I'm planning to do a separate write up of the shows (hence their absence in this post) so keep your eyes peeled if you're interested in that :-D

More music time: Cesair and The Moon and the Nightspirit

Firstly I should probably apologise for the delay once again. This refers to last Saturday so I guess I'm under a week late which is good with my recent track record. Deadlines, exams, and illness have decided to destroy any semblance of organisation in my life, as usual! I did actually take my camera to this show and it was the first time I've attempted to take photos in low light conditions. Not the best results ever, as one might expect for a first attempt, but there are a few photos that might work out okay and I'll upload those onto facebook in the coming days... if they do exist ;-)

Anyway, I haven't said what I'm rambling on about yet, although the title has probably given it away. Saturday saw Thijs, Hester and I make our way to Leiden for a show of Cesair and The Moon and the Nightspirit. It's actually really nice to have Thijs who is basically into exactly the same eclectic mix of music as I am as we get to accompany each other to shows (well, he babysits me really, if we're honest!!) and Hester, who's just getting into the genre, is so so over-excitable. It's actually quite adorable. So we both babysit her ;-)

I have the most stunning friends.

Anyway, we managed to find our way to the venue which is tucked away a bit and probably would be quite unnoticeable unless you know it's there. As always, we were early. Yes, you can probably blame the paranoid about being late British person for that! Anyway, the venue itself was absolutely lovely. The staff members were polite and friendly. The layout of the venue was great with a stepped back area which served as a seating place and also would allow for people to see from the back quite nicely. Couple of annoyingly placed pillars but I guess you can't moan about structural necessity. The sad thing is that the venue faces closure at the moment which would really suck, to put it plainly. There is a petition on the go to save it which you should go and sign here.

So, after lurking at the back, at the top of the stepped area, and taking the obligatory pre-show selfies the lights lowered and my friends went down to the main area for the show. Of course, my delightful friends forgot that I have the whole vision disability, no night vision at all, and was therefore quite as blind as a kitten. I managed to get down the first step... misjudged the rest and somehow landed on my feet, propelling myself across the room and straight into aforementioned friends. That's karma for you! I'm hoping it looked like an elegant jump as opposed to the flailing reality!!

Anyway, a brief comment on the music is in order, I think. As always, I don't need to tell you that Cesair were great. They are a highly skilled set of people playing some wonderful pieces and it makes for a consistently marvelous show. Again, the set was a mixture of older pieces and the newer songs. It's also getting to the stage where Thijs keeps leaning over and going "oooh I like this one" after practically every next-song announcement. I'm not sure if he realised quite how often he was saying that but I guess he does now he's read this!! And it can only be a compliment to the music, of course. Also have to commend the lighting design this time, I think. Not the best for my first attempt at photographing this type of show but certainly atmospheric and fitting, of course, that's what really matters.

Following Cesair was The Moon and the Nightspirit, a group from Hungary who have a perhaps more atmospheric sound. This is the second time I've seen them and, if I'm totally honest, I think this set was a lot stronger than the other one I saw. Despite liking their recorded music, I felt the first show I saw was good but not great. However, this time, I felt they did perform well so I suppose I managed to catch them on an off day last time... or my own mind wasn't in the mood for it, who knows. The audience was really dynamic for their set too, a lot of movement and dance. I know that isn't a comment on the music so much as the atmosphere but the combination of the two matters when it's a live show. In fact, I wonder if that was the difference here compared to the previous show, the audience seemed much more engaged and that has to increase the overall energy. Anyway, I'm rambling on again, as usual!

After the show we attempted to get a photo with the bands which has become rather our habit and is actually really nice for me as a scrapbooker. Seriously, the fact that my friends are into getting photos and taking selfies and whatever makes my life so much easier because heck, I'm too shy to ask so I'd leave without. Also got to test my Dutch skills while Hester and Thijs socialised a bit. The diagnosis: I understand it pretty well now but still can't actually speak a word. Urgh, I need to get classes. Didn't even speak any Hungarian ;-) Mind you, I'm losing the minimal amount I had anyway through lack of practice!

Photo very kindly taken by Kees who also photographed the event.

I'm not quite sure how this developed from a blog post about a gig into a rant about my failings as a linguist but there we go. That's how my mind's working tonight!

Oh, and I have a wonderful weekend to look forward to as some of my music-y friends from the UK are coming over to adventure in Amsterdam. Very excited. 

Now to get healthy before tomorrow!

Lovely times with lovely people

Yesterday I planned to go into town because I had errands to run. Sonja planned to go across town because she had to buy a bike. We decided to smush our plans together and drag Dania and Leonoor along to make a day of it.

And then the best thing happened... we woke up to snow! I have so been hoping for snow recently as I seem to keep being in the wrong country when it does snow and therefore keep missing it. Yes, I know, I'm very much a child when it comes to things like this. Annoyingly, the weather did mean that Leonoor decided to stay behind as she wasn't feeling top form and didn't want to be out in the cold and wet. We missed her but she was definitely wise as today I've been feeling absolutely awful but there we go. It was worth it ;-)

A bit worn down as this photo was taken late in the morning.
The view from my window was truly stunning at dawn.

I can't say that I managed to do what I wanted to do in town but had a great day, nevertheless. We messed around in the shops a little and spent a bit too much money for a student budget, or I did anyway. Because we've not got classes together at the moment we're having to put in a bit more effort to socialise so those times when we do manage to meet up are extra special.

Custom made magnum icecreams might not have been
100% appropriate for the weather but they were worth it!

And, as if it wasn't enough to spend the day with that wonderful duo, I finally managed to pin down The Best Friend and skype with her. I've been here for all but six months now and this is the first time I've managed to catch her on skype. Impressive.

It was a combination of madness and of chilledness. Both in our dressing gowns, we managed to call for three hours. Admittedly, that call involved me watching her make dinner but, for the most part, it was just chatting, catching up and messing around. 

The fact we're not in the same physical space will not stop my
photo taking obsession. You're never safe mwahaha.

And then I missed the Aimee. 

Oops.

A brief update

Firstly, I feel that I should apologise for being so silent for the past two weeks. Yes, it's been exactly a fortnight since I wrote a blog post although it's not been for the want of trying. Life has been busy and I've also been ill a fair bit which hasn't been so much fun but has narrowed down the amount of time available! That said there have been multiple occasions where I have sat down, meaning to type, and found myself unable. 

It's not been for want of something to write about as life has been a whirl of social and academic madness. There's been such a speed to things because of the intensive period at university and this means that life has taken on an immediacy that is daunting - indeed I have my final exam in today, a mere two and a half weeks after starting the course - but also beautiful. The moments that have been stolen away from study have been startling in the freedom they have offered. Silly things like cooking for Robbert with Dania to pay him back for teaching us to ride months ago and listening to them both sing as they attempted to give me the confidence to join in have made me, once again appreciate how lucky I am in my friends here. Slightly reckless things like going for a walk in the park late at night with Leonoor, Sonja and Dania have been wonderful moments of freedom from the never ending barreling forwardness of life and, it seems, from the rush of this city. Walking to class each morning, a little earlier than most people, having the path to myself gives me a slowness and a while for reflection where I can take in the colours of the morning sky, the crispness of the dawn, the magnificence of frost as adorns grass areas. It's little moments such as these that have given the past few weeks meaning.

However, I have also really drawn something from the course itself. In my last post, I confessed that I didn't really know what to expect from the pompously titled Global Identity Experience. Now, going into my final exam, I must admit that I'm not really sure what this course hoped to achieve. Nevertheless, it has facilitated some human connection on a profound level. As part of this course we have to undertake a group research project on a minority grouping in the Amsterdam area. My group (full of people I did not know for the most part but who have turned out to be great) decided to focus on Schiphol airport and, after some initial observations, the homeless people living at the airport. it was a great surprise to us to learn that there were any, let alone so many, homeless people living at the airport as it's not someone we naturally expect. Airports are a place you pass through, scrambling to get somewhere and you do not expect or notice those people who are outside of the rush. 

We've spoken to some people living in the airport and, in particular, one interview last Friday touched me on such a deep level. I phoned my mother when I got in and spent a few hours just talking about it and crying. To have so swiftly gained access to a person's inner life, to see the things they have survived through yet be helpless to assist - not that they would want your assistance... or pity - it was hard for me. But also what an honour. I obviously cannot write a lot about this project because I have to respect anonymity and perhaps that is something that has held me back from writing at all as it has had a noticeable impact on my life both in scheduling and emotional terms. It is something that I feel I am gaining from, however, if not as a student then as a human being.

So, this has been a very good way for me to avoid revising and, no doubt, when I get into my exam in exactly one hour I will regret it! I am so looking forward to this exam being over though so I can be ill in peace, tidy my flat, have friends round tomorrow evening, paint all weekend, finish the research project, and greet a February that is full of wonderful social and musical events. Just one exam to go!

This post is not for facebook as it's a bit of a feeling smush and is also really boring, not having pictures and all that jazz.I should probably write a proper facebook posting update soon too. Heh. Does anyone even read this bit?? 

Getting back in the swing of things!

It's been like starting again. The scary leaving home feeling, the nerves about being in the right place, not knowing in advance who's in my class etc etc. It's weird.

Luckily for me, my dad decided mother should book flights over with me; if she hadn't, my luggage wouldn't have fitted within allowance... and I probably wouldn't have been emotionally strong enough to get on the plane. It's not that I didn't want to come back here but rather that I didn't want to leave there. It's hard for me not being around my family.

Anyway, for the next four weeks I'm taking just one course 'The Global Identity Experience' which is basically all day, every day. If the course title sounds vague then I apologise (although it's not my fault) and welcome you to the world of AUC! It's a course that's a mixture of research and anthropological/sociological theory and looks at social identity and minority groupings, particularly in this age of accelerated globalisation. The course itself looks rather interesting, if the work load is a little heavy, and the teacher won me over when he suggested we may like to take our shoes off in class. For someone who regularly wears flip-flops and enjoys going barefoot... well, he's got my vote!

All joking aside, it has been great to be back and to hang out with, and catch up with, friends. Mind you, there was one scary moment last night when, mid conversation, we heard someone scratching on the door... which we also realised was unlocked. Eventually we plucked up the courage went out to see what was going on and found this message on the door:

Can you tell that I've hastily and badly edited out my room number? hehe

Sadly, it wasn't just us who were scared half to death but my next door neighbour as see was looking out the door  and Laura realised (after the event) that she was still holding a rather large knife from cutting up apple pie when she went out to explore.... oops! Mind you, as I got no sleep last night due to extremely loud music coming from that side, I don't feel too bad about it.

So yeah, thank you Robbert for the sweet message <3

Yep, I feel good to be back now :-D

I'm free! I'm free! (etc. etc.)

My final essay has just been submitted and I'm sat here surrounded by the chaos that comes from panic studying without having spent time tidying up that Christmas party of a few days ago. The empty mince pie box is totally my doing though... eating six in one day when stress-writing is perfectly socially acceptable, right?

It's really strange to think that I've been living here for close to half a year now, my first semester (sans weird intensive period) is finished. Thank goodness. Now that I'm free my brain is trying to work out what I should do first... paint or translate or tidy or scrapbook or edit photos or or or... yeah, who am I kidding? I'm going into hibernation ;-)

Lets be honest, I've been essay writing from a sleeping bag.
We've been at hibernation point for some time now!

All joking aside, the last couple of days have been really strange, saying goodbye to the people I have essentially been living with. These people have seen me on my squint days, in my pajamas, been in my flat at its messiest (not all at the same time). They've come to see more of me than most people I've known for years and, in that regard, some of the most intense bonds have been formed. It's strange but quite brilliant. What's even stranger is the fact that we're all suddenly being flung around the globe once again. Okay, it's only for two weeks but it's still rather bizarre. That is something that will never fail to amaze me, the way people here are just so wonderful and the way we've gelled. Better start saving up for a miracle waterproof mascara for graduation!

That said, I simply cannot wait to go home. I've been getting emails from my technically inept father with a count down for some days now. Actually, just realised he's a day out and someone should probably tell him I'm flying on Sunday, not tomorrow... oops.

The fact that it's Christmas just makes it all even better. Just being around family and old friends with glittery things and lights and warmth and good food sounds like heaven right now. Okay, it sounds like heaven every year but especially after being away from home for so long. Annoyingly, I have no idea where my Christmas elf outfit is so I'll have to dig that out so I can dress up to give presents to my little nephews again this year!!

Yes, in case you have got this far and haven't guessed, I'm both excited and exhausted. This has been your complete stream of consciousness blog for tonight. Now I'm going to go and see about this hibernation idea!!

I can safely say this is the first time I've ever 'built' a tree.

The day before Zoë and I were due to fly to England the unthinkable happened. My (artificial) Christmas tree suddenly arrived. I know... a week late! Anyway, we hurriedly arranged the troops to make good on earlier plans to meet up and decorate.

I don't have to explain to you how much I love Christmas. If you know me at all then you will know that I'm the kind of person who bounces around for months in advance, listening to Christmas music, baking Christmas food (not so much here but wait til I get home!), making things glittery. I might not celebrate it as a religious festival but it still represents most things that I love about life and about winter, in particular. There's a true emphasis on togetherness and family and warmth. It's a few days when the world is shut out and peace does seem to reign, just for a while. Of course, it's how life should be generally but I'll not get into that.

Yes, this is what trees look like nowadays, children.

So anyway, the tree arrived and, with a bit of teamwork we managed to push it, in the giant box, through the building complex from Dania's room to mine. It wasn't exactly heavy but bulky... oh it was that!

Dania left for a while to work on an essay, leaving Zoë and me to attempt to assemble the tree ready for decorating. Okay, so I had a fake tree back home that I used to put in my room (in addition to a real tree downstairs). You'd kinda stand it up, pull the branches down from the centre and you were done. Oh no, not this one. This one came with an instruction manual in quite a few different languages as well as several rather odd looking parts. Okay, so it wasn't exactly complex in the end but you have no idea how much trouble we had putting this thing together.... kinda concerning when one thinks that we're both supposed to be somewhat intelligent, Zoë studying at Oxford and all that jazz.

Serious work going on here. Highly skilled labour.

It was then time for Leonoor and Dania to join us, with pizza, and for us all to chill and bit before making my room extra sparkly. Seriously, any excuse for a bit of a social evening and some junk food!

Lights. Eep.

Okay, so the first thing I noticed is that Christmas lights here are weird. I would say that it was just the ones I bought but Leonoor insisted that they're normal so I'm guessing it's a Dutch Christmas light issue. The string that they come on is circular. I don't know why this is the case because a looped string of lights have got to be less practical - what if I wanted to put them around the edges of my room? But yeah, there's an odd, seeming, difference from back in the UK ;-)

Having fought with the lights - they were not easy to get on the tree even with four of us working at it - it was time for the baubles to go on. I went to make tea like the good host, and put some mince pies in the oven. I came back and found my poor tree groaning under the weight of nearly 100 baubles. Okay, I exaggerate, and it does look good, but I had to laugh at the way my friends managed to attack the tree in about two minutes. It's so special though because it's been decorated by some of my special people it's an extra special tree to me.

Don't want to have to take it down!

Tah-dah!

Guess what? This post is not for facebook because it's been sitting in my drafts for waaaaay too long!

An evening in Amsterdam

I'll admit that, when I first moved here, Amsterdam didn't really catch my imagination. Everything seemed a bit artificial and I just couldn't see the appeal of the city itself. However, I've found myself rapidly falling in love with the place. The more time you spend here and the more you explore of the tourist track, the more the city unfolds. Granted, one could say the same of any major city but, with Amsterdam, I've really felt that transition.

On Wednesday night I went out with a group to have dinner, belatedly celebrating Sonja and my birthday. As always, the company was wonderful and the food was good too but it was what happened afterwards that made the night, I think, for us all.

We walked.

It was the middle of the evening, the air was crisp but dry, the streets almost empty, the city lit up ready for the festive season. It was beautiful.

When you escape from the plastic and neons of the tourist specific areas, step out into the night-time atmosphere, you enter a whole different world. This was a romantic world and not one that you see when you step off the train when you first arrive. It was a strange walk as we passed by houses with the 'perfect' family sitting scrapbooking in the window, a picture postcard scene; stunning churches which led to debates over the age and denomination based on art history and Dutch history, eventually solved by google; cosy bars with people obviously having a wonderful evening... if you could imagine a perfect evening walk, this is as close as reality gets.

And that is what I've realised about this city... Meandering alongside canals and over bridges, walking for the sake of taking the prettiest route you find so much. I'm not sure if we would ever find some of the places again but I am sure that, for me anyway, even if I was to revisit the area it would never hold quite the same magic as in that night.

this post is not for facebook

"Happy Amazing Birthday"

It's Monday and the weekend is drawing to a close. My parents have left, class has just finished, there are assignments staring at me with eyes full of judgement. I feel sad to see the end of this time but generally happy that it has been so beautiful.

My parents arrived on Thursday which, quite frankly, was the best birthday gift anyone could have given me. Thursday evening was spent unpacking goodies (clean clothes and cheddar cheese, thank you very much!), eating dinner and generally messing around. It was a normal evening. You cannot guess how good it felt to have a 'normal evening' once again.

Did I ever tell you that my mother hates loud noises?

Friday was my birthday and, after finishing a few essays for a rather tight deadline (I'm sure I fluffed them in my hurry but oh well!), it was time for my parents to return and to celebrate properly. Leonoor and Dania also turned up, bearing pie and candles, bless them! To have the pair of them turn up with edible stuff and twenty candles - they wouldn't settle for any less - was just really special. It's those thoughtful moments that mean the world.

Lighting twenty candles is quite some feat!

Over the afternoon/early evening we were joined by Robbert, who sang a birthday song which was a really special moment, and Thijs, who made me some really sweet 'vouchers' which are going straight into my scrapbook. It was just such a beautiful evening of memories. 

Somehow, all my friends appeared to manage to cope with my dad which is quite impressive considering he tends to terrify people I know... he was on his best behaviour though, I guess! 

Woollen gifts, instantly enjoyed.

Most of the weekend was spent lurking with my parents and, while it was so special for me it's not the most interesting reading for you lot (we went to the supermarket twice - it was really fun and that's not even sarcasm). However, there's one other moment that has to be mentioned and that's when Sonja, who had been ill between her own birthday earlier in the week and mine, bless her, came round. She wanted to come round to bring me a poster, which is up already, but the fact she didn't want to wait until class, wrote such a nice message on the poster, and came bearing hugs was just so lovely. Every day at AUC I am reminded how lucky I am that I have such wonderful people around me.

This is without mentioning the messages people sent. Hopefully I've replied to everyone individually now but as I only had mobile internet I may have missed you... if so sorry. Every single message was special to me from the simple "Happy Birthday" to videos of orchestras playing Happy Birthday in different styles to messages in multiple languages. Thank you every one of you. Thank you for making this weekend so awesome.

There's always one candle...

(P.S. Just for University-Aleksandra  who just gave me a card: Yes, I will continue to write and you are more than welcome to stalk me. Also, drawings of me on flying carpets made of books = awesome. Thank you!)

Help! The essays are coming to get me! (and other stories)

When I have a lot of work to do I'm always really productive. I clean my room, I send letters letters to friends I should have contacted weeks ago, I write useless blog posts. I guess I do a bit of the work too...

At the moment I have four essays weighing on my mind; two (and a bit) are due over the next week. In addition, with my parents visiting and both Sonja and my birthdays on the horizon I'm trying to get everything done early. It's not working out so well but there we go. And that's before I mention the 300 pages of reading for Monday.

That said, I'm kinda enjoying my papers. My history of art paper is looking at a stunning example of a Greek vase which also has some great links to culture and mythology and I'm rather enjoying studying that aspect, even if I'm not so sure on the paper style for this subject. I have chosen to look at one of my favourite films for literary and cultural theory although, as I'm analysing it psychoanalytically, I will probably ruin my childhood in the process. For my academic writing class I'm working on a paper about the reasons for conversion to neo-pagan faiths. Fascinating topic but driving me mad researching the thing ;-)

I've been lucky to be able to slot in social moments too, over the past week or so, with Laura and her flatmates (and ultimately her whole corridor, it seems) throwing a party on Tuesday night. Although I didn't stay for all that long - I'm quite boring at parties! - it was such fun to just mess around with friends. 

My only non-blurry photo from the evening. Sorry Leonoor!

Friday evening, however, really has to stand out as one of the best moments of the past little while. Running straight from class to catch a train into the centre to meet up with Maria and catch some of the final concerts of the Cello Biennale was a real change of pace.

Actually, Maria and I first started chatting, many moons ago, because of our shared love for the cello, although she plays 100x better than I ever did. Indeed, she was telling me about the Cello Biennale, a two week long cello festival, before I had even started playing with the idea of moving here. To go to some of the events was fitting.

Image from www.muziekgebouw.nl 

We managed to catch a concert of several students from the Boston Conservatoire before the main concert. This was a delightful way to precede the main event which was the final of the Nationaal Cello Concours. Not only was it an evening of high quality music, as one might expect, but it was a chance to really compare style of three talented individuals. It was also a good chance to practice Dutch as the prizes were presented and winners announced in the language despite the rest being conducted in English, oddly. I'll never get used to how English is casually used in this country, even among native speakers. Anyway, I digress, happily, the person Maria and I both voted to win did so.

The biennale is now over, and Maria will be having withdrawal symptoms, I'm sure, as she's been living there! We have got one more show related to it to look forward to, however, and that is the Apocalyptica concert which was supposed to open the event but was postponed until November. Looking forward to attacking Maria with some metal ;-)

Right, I better get on with this work. It's staring at me reproachfully as I type so I don't think I can put it off much longer!

Escaping the bubble

Before setting out. Photo stolen from Leonoor.

As one of my classes has called a reading week this week, I had no class today (which was bliss) and a group of us used the chance to get out of the bubble and explore town a bit.

We caught the tram in and grabbed some really tasty pasta for lunch. The portions were huge, the food really tasty, the company even better... except I didn't eat my companions. Anyway, moving swiftly on...

Rubbish photo but it was so tasty!!

We also had a moment looking at the library. I'm not sure if I'm going to join, myself, as you have to pay a fee to take books out and I just don't think I will get enough use out of it but it's a really sweet little place. Best of all, on the seventh floor there's a café with a balcony which has a glorious view of the city. There's a real feeling of freedom being up that high.

Moving on from the library, we went in search of vintage and second hand stores and my goodness, there are some beautiful clothing shops in the town. On the bright side, I don't think I'll ever find any of them again... if I do I could spend so much money so easily. Very proud that I didn't spend my month's allowance in one day! Once you get off of the tourist route this is such a lovely little city but you just have to work hard to get away from the artificial façade.

Human statue :-D

The evening was equally enjoyable with pizza take out and general chilling. All in all, a really fun day! Now I just have to work through the pile of reading that I've got to fight my way through for tomorrow... not so fun ;-) 

Socialising, studying, and a new phone number.

You have no idea how hard it was for me to break from recently established routine this week with the bike post thing. Anyway, no worries, we're back to the Sunday Summary for today at least ;-)

I guess, although I posted a status about it on Facebook, I should probably mention the choir audition. Wendy messaged me on Monday evening to say that choir was meeting in about an hour and did I want to join her and go. I had no idea there was any audition element and agreed, spending the next hour in utter terror. When we arrived and found out that there was an audition element Wendy stopped me from running away, something for which I am grateful! Neither of us had prepared a song and I ended up attempting something I hardly knew so I knew there was no chance of me getting in (and I didn't but that's not the point). However, the range exercises went really, really well and the fact that I managed to do this is such a big deal. It's baby steps but I am getting over a phobia that has been around since I was about eleven. A year ago I would never have dreamed I would have managed to actually audition for a choir. So happy.

Tuesday has already been chronicled in the bike riding post so no need to go over that again!!

So, onto Wednesday and the impromptu pot-luck dinner and 'girlie night'. Randomly suggested at some point during the day, and quickly adopted as a great idea, Leonoor, Sonja, Laura, Dania and myself all met up for dinner. I had nothing out of the freezer due to the short notice of the whole thing and therefore hosted which was really fun as I got to lurk at home and eat other people's food!

Laura, me, Ms. Camera Shy after dinner :-)

For those of you who aren't at AUC, this little group is the group that is in basically all my classes so we naturally get to spend a lot of time together. Add to that the fact that they're great people and you can see why the evening was so lovely. It was also nice to spend time outside of class getting to know each other a bit better and, most importantly, to just chill a bit.

As for the rest of the week, well, it's been mainly dominated by essay writing which isn't so much fun but I guess it is what I'm here for! Also been feeling a bit crappy health wise but eh, I'm doing better than normal so can't really complain!

The other bit of 'important' news is that I finally have a working Dutch phone number. I'm, obviously, not posting it here but drop me a facebook message and I'll send it to you happily. For all the people with my English number: I will keep that number and use it when I'm in the UK so don't delete it - just don't expect me to check it when I'm out of the country! I'll also say about the new number in a facebook status in a couple of days but have been 'statusing' more than normal over the past week so will wait a couple of days ;-)

I swear, there is no logic to riding something with two wheels!

So, finally, after many weeks of deliberating (*), Dania and I agreed to attempt to learn to cycle on the evening of the twenty-third of September two-thousand and fourteen.

Luckily on leaving my room and attempting to unlock my bike I encountered Robbert, one of my neighbours. Seeing my feeble attempts to free my bicycle from various locks, he obviously decided that I was not fit to be set free on his country and agreed to assume the role of 'cycle teacher'. Seriously, I am so, so grateful to him, no doubt as is Dania, because we would have been in a right mess without his assistance and support! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Of course, as the Dutch person, Robbert was the cycling expert and was keen to impart all of his years of knowledge. First lesson: how to untangle your shoe lace when it gets trapped in the bike chain!

It was Dania who freed it in the end with her awesome logic.
She also took this photo :-)

I must say that, all joking aside, I was impressed with how well Robbert managed to break down how to ride a bike as trying to explain how to do something when you have been doing it for as long as you remember... well, that's not easy! I'm also really impressed with Dania who managed to improve so, so much.

As for me, I managed to ride in a wobbly corner-less line. I apparently can't say it was a straight line because of the wobbly nature but all the same! It was also a great improvement from my first attempt at riding this bike (which my mother has named Fiona, by the way). This time, I didn't peddle once... straight into a wall.

So the bike riding adventure has well and truly begun for Dania and I. We're certainly not ready to be let lose on Amsterdam yet but give us a few more practices, and a babysitter, and it just might happen!

(*) Okay, it was about two weeks but that doesn't sound half as dramatic!

One month on!

As it seems that I have taken to writing weekly summaries on a Sunday (it's not planned) it just happens, I expected this to be another boring post full of nothingness with which to numb the minds of the poor souls who actually read this. Well, it probably is going to be that still, don't get your hopes up too much!

However, just as I sat down to write I noticed the date. It's the 21st. That means that it's exactly one month since I moved here. I've been living in the Netherlands for one whole month. It does not feel like that long at all. It's really, really weird!

However, saying that, last week was a really good week for me as it all started to feel a lot more settled. My sleep pattern has started to return to normal (I'd been waking at least four times each night and unable to sleep beyond about 6:30) and things have started to feel more in control and generally chilled. It's only as things settle down that you realise how much of a strain life has been but then I think that's to be expected when you're living on your own for the first time, moving to a foreign country, every piece of admin is going wrong, and you're starting at a new university. Certainly, for the first time, last week things started to feel more normal and more like home. So maybe it's not so strange that a month has passed!

So, a brief summary of last week:
Wednesday evening was a pup quiz at the university café. It was a nice evening. Went up with Wendy and then joined with a couple of older students and Julika to form a team for the night. I am so out of practice with pub quizing though, worrying as I used to go to the pub and compete each week, and was totally useless! Would certainly go up again all the same as it's a nice evening out... and I need to get back in practice!

Friday saw me hand in my first paper. Thursday saw my computer delete my first paper (and the back up file) in a complete blip. You can guess that it was finished in a bit of a flap but it wasn't too big a deal. Not the best thing I've ever written but, for a first attempt at a university paper, I'm not too disappointed.

Friday was also the day of the AUC Lustrum celebration marking five years of the university. I went for a little while with some friends and hung around, chatted, and ate really nice pistachio ice cream. I didn't stay all that long though because I was tired and didn't really find my way round what was going on.

I did manage to get my father a bottle for his collection ;-)

And then yesterday was another lovely afternoon and evening with Maria. After she rescued me when I got totally lost trying to find the market where she works we spent some time having a drink with her father and some colleagues which was lovely and then went back to hers for dinner. She even taught me how to use the buses and showed me that, in fact, my supermarket troubles stem from me going to a weird supermarket. Seriously, the one near her flat is so, so easy!

Did I mention Maria's pet chicks?

All in all, a wonderful week. Really looking forward to seeing what next week has in store! Now I should probably return to my two other papers that are, annoyingly, not writing themselves in my absence!

Sleep and relaxation

Okay, the title is wishful thinking, coming from the mind of a sleep deprived person, but there we go! My last post was only a couple of days ago but life's busy enough that I'm able to write pretty often and easily find things to talk about.

The highlight of Thursday night:
Walking home with a dinosaur... in a hoodie.

Thursday evening was an open stage and awards night. It was the social summary of the introduction week but, to be quite honest, I wasn't really looking forward to it that much. As it happened, it was an okay evening. There were some really talented people, some funny acts, but it was a bit chaotic and haphazard and I was generally tired and not really wanting to be there. I think, by that stage, I needed my bed, and some space!

Friday was a shorter day, with just an hour long tutor session on time management. The session ran over and we didn't finish properly. The irony is not lost. Anywho, most of the other students tootled on off to their weekend away and I stayed behind. Hope they're having a good time while I relax ;-)

I decided to use Friday afternoon for paperwork and admin, of which there is more than you could possibly imagine. I mean, think of all the things you would need to do to move abroad and then times that idea by four. It's really surprising how much there is to do... but I digress. Finding that I needed to print one of the forms off, and lacking a printer, Maria, one of my penpals, kindly offered to print off the form for me and to bring it round.

She arrived at around four pm and then suddenly it was dark. It was the first time we'd met in person but somehow we managed to get on so easily that time just flew past without either of us noticing. It was so nice to meet her, finally, and to chat. I'm looking forward to seeing her again soon, I hope!

Today was a less impromptu meeting, with the lovely Annelies. She showed me round Amsterdam a little more, and showed me some lovely shops that were definitely my style. We then stumbled across the Uitmarkt which is a free festival thing, at the beginning of the season, with events and stands based around all the arts. It was great to explore some of the things that will be going on over the next few months (even if as a poor student I won't be able to afford to go!!!) and it's quite exciting. Annelies also trained me in the art of taking things that were offered for free ;-)

What can I say? The hats were free!

Events aside, we had a good day! Annelies is a really kind person and such good fun too so it's great to get to meet up with her. It's certainly been a good start to my weekend! As for how it will continue? Sleep and relaxation, of course! (*)




(*) Please note: "Sleep and relaxation" hereby means "filling in forms, doing grocery shopping, attempting to unpack the flat, and preparing for my first classes!"

Tascha time!!!!

Yesterday was a really exciting day for me as I met up with my dear friend Natascha. Tascha had planned to visit England, being from Austria herself, and I delayed my move in order to get to meet her once again. We last saw each other in Vienna where we spent a good few days exploring, and where we celebrated my eighteenth birthday together. If you can't work it out from that I'll clarify: We've not seen each other in way too long!

We met up outside Camden station in London and it was truly wonderful to see her again. Tascha is one of the kindest people I know and it really is a shame that we live so far. It was truly amazing to meet up with Tascha again and I am not even going to try and put it into words. Despite her protestations that her English had worsened (her English is great) we really did pick up where we left off and had a wonderful time. I was also lucky enough to get to meet her cousin,who I think is called Sabrina but I didn't catch her name after the initial introduction so apologies if I am wrong!

Can you tell which of the cousins was sitting in the sun?

It was great to be back in Camden after a while of not visiting. The mazes of stalls, all full of clothes and items that I could quite easily integrate into my collection are all fun to explore. I maintain that the best way to explore the area is to simply walk and get lost in the markets. If you try to find something in particular it's not going to work out quite so well! 

We also had a Turkish wrap thing off one of the street food stalls. Not only were the people on the stall lovely but the food was good too. Indeed, we've not had one of these pancake things (I forget the name and the stall just called the wraps) since my mother and I were in Turkey and sitting in a little tent. It was really nostalgic for me!

Of course, I never manage to show people around without there being some drama and this came in the shape of getting caught in the middle of a police chase. By this, I mean that the bloke who was running managed to hit me in the head with something as he went past. Nice couple of hours of dizziness (sorry to Tascha and Sabrina who had to look after me!) and a lovely bruise forming today. Not complaining because, seriously, these are the events that make the best stories for the future!! It was really funny though as one of the stall holders came over to clarify that this wasn't what England's normally like, bless him!

By this time, it was about time for us to part anyway as The Visitors had tickets for The Book of Mormon and needed to go to theatre land! Can you tell I'm jealous? ;-)

Tascha then really surprised my mother and I by giving us gifts that she had brought with her. My favourite, and that of my family, has to be the home made miniature bottles of schnapps with a little gnome on the bottle. Those feel so special and my bottle is going to take pride of place on one of my shelves in my new room no doubt. It was really sad to part, once again, and I simply hope that we manage to see one another soon, and, indeed, hope that both she and her cousin have a safe flight home on Thursday.

<3

Of course, after a day like that, the journey home simply couldn't be smooth... The car broke down, having been serviced the day before, and we were stuck for about three hours on the M1 - luckily we got to a service station. That said, the drama of the day really brought people out of themselves. Stall holders who came to check I was okay earlier in the day, the men who stopped to try and help with the car, the gentleman and his family who  lived locally and said that we could go to his if need be, the lady who gave us parking for free because it would have cost us twenty pounds otherwise, the cashier at the service station who came over and chatted for ages after his shift so we didn't get bored. These kind of interactions only really happen in mini (or larger!) crises but don't they remind you of the beauty of humanity. If only we all came out of our shells a little more and showed each other the love that we have inside, and if only society allowed that to happen.

"Are you going to put this on your blog?"

Why yes, Zoë, I am!

I sit here with aching feet having traversed cobbles in completely inappropriate footwear, but having had an all in all lovely day.

Enjoying being a tourist in my own country :-D

It would just be my luck to choose the one day with buckets of rain to visit the city of Oxford but there we go. I should have expected it! I've only ever really visited the city with specific aims in mind, mainly to see something at one of the theatres, so I think this is the first time I've got to really look around at all. Admittedly, the weather did hamper things a little, and I rather believe Zoë was a bit disappointed that she couldn't show me more, but it was great to look around. Besides, I have an excuse to come back in better weather now ;-)

Of course, the highlight for me had to be meeting up with my friend from college as we last saw each other at Christmas. Just to sit and chat about her adventures was wonderful. Having just been to Bosnia, she made us both a cup of Bosnian style coffee and my goodness it was beautiful. Just to chat about life in a relaxed environment with a good friend felt so good! Annoyingly, because I couldn't afford the trains, I cadged a lift and had to leave quite early. Certainly have to meet up again and soon!

In other news, I have my room allocation for university and it is indeed a single. If anyone (who knows me, obviously) wants the address then message me somewhere and I can give it to you. Goodness, it all seems very real now!

For those who are sitting, and are stressed about, exams

The funny thing about my gap year is that I'm stuck in my own little bubble away from the press of life and yet I still see it going on around me. I watch as friends get really worried about their exams, tormented by worries about whether they will pass or fail. I suppose that, removed from the frenzy, I see it more clearly. It worries me.

I spoke to one friend today, who may well read this but will remain nameless. This person is really worried about the exams they've already sat and feels that the ones they have left to sit are useless. In their mind, they have already failed. In my mind, I know this person is amazing. They're intelligent (more than they, or anyone else really, gives them credit for) and they have worked hard. Perhaps too hard. Perhaps it now matters too much to them. This person has pushed the boundaries of what people said they would be able to do. They have achieved more than people gave them credit for. They're dedicated and wonderful but they simply don't see that. They just feel that they didn't know the answers and therefore it's time to give in. 

What they don't see is that they've already won. 

Just by trying their best, by getting to where they are, they are winning. You are winning. 

If you 'fail' or don't do as well as you had hoped then there is always a way to make it better, be it a resit or a change of plan. It seems like the end of the world at the time but keep ploughing on and it will pass, it will get better, and you will succeed somehow.

And in a couple of months, those exams which are the centre of the universe right now will not matter one iota. What are they after all?

Keep strong. Keep fighting. You can conquer anything.

Besides, you don't need to pass any exams... you're wonderful just the way you are <3

What a week!

The last few days have been really lovely as my 'really busy week' concluded with the visit from my penpal, and friend, Annelies.

You can't visit Birmingham without having your photo taken here!

She arrived on Thursday and we spent the afternoon wandering around a little bit of Birmingham and exploring the jewellery quarter a little bit. Of course, I hardly know my way around the jewellery quarter as I've only been there once so I didn't really manage to show it off but oh well! That wasn't the important bit!

Friday we went to The Black Country Living Museum which is a museum chronicling life in the industrial area around Dudley. Although it didn't seem as 'alive' as other times I've visited it was great to look around again. I went to this museum many, many times as a child but hadn't visited for a good five years or so. It was also a good place to challenge Annelies' English because goodness knows a strong Black Country accent (and dialect) is hard for even a native speaker at times.

Yesterday was another day in Birmingham. First we went to the new(ish) library, somewhere I hadn't managed to visit since it opened. My goodness, what a library! I really cannot wait to go back there and actually borrow some books. It's huge. I think it's the largest regional library in Europe or something so I guess I should have expected big but my so many books... what a dream! And how exciting to have those resources available for research! Ahem.

So big. So many books. Happy Havanah.

Later we mooched around the shopping areas and also visited the Bullring markets. I was a bit sad that I couldn't find a sheeps head this time but it was still good fun to walk through the stalls with butchers (and other salesmen but it's the butchers that stand out) attempting to sell their wares. We also spent a bit of time in the Selfridges food hall. For some reason, I've not spent a lot of time there although I've been in the store for makeup and clothing. I'll be revisiting the food hall, no doubt!

Anyway, today Annelies went on to London for a few days and, I hope, is having a wonderful time down there. I was so happy to meet her and I think we got on really well so hopefully we'll see each other again soon when I'm out in the Netherlands (or when she comes over here).

Now, I'm going to enjoy catching up on my sleep!